Recently, I was putting Ethan to bed and was hit by the “How did the baby get in your tummy?” question. Gagging for a post-bedtime routine cup a tea and completely blindsided by the question, the following downright hilarious conversation ensued:
Me: “The baby came from the stars, pet.”
Ethan: “How did the baby get from the stars into your tummy?”
Me: “Eh, How do you think the baby got in my tummy?”
Ethan: “I think a rocket ship got the baby from the stars then when you were sleeping, it opened your bum a little bit and shot the baby up into your tummy.”
Me: (dumbfounded at the almost-accuracy and holding back laughter) “…I don’t think a rocket ship has ever been near my bum darlin’… Now go to sleep. Night night”.
I will probably never know why my son figured I’d been violated by a spaceship vs swallowing a magic seed or something, but it did get me thinking about the birds and the bees. He’s four years old and I didn’t feel the need to get into the particulars with him at 8pm at night. But Gavin and I have always operated with the notion that we’ll explain all things honestly and fully to our kids, so I guess it’s a matter of time.
I don’t recall my parents ever explaining sex to me and to this day I’m quite thankful. I believe I learned about the concept the usual way, from some friends at school.
I have had some very progressive friends who talked about sex at home from a very early age and even bought their kids a book with big pictures explaining the whole concept. This was before I had children of my own and I remember being impressed by how sex-positive and normalised the whole thing was in their family.
But considering my flapping response at this recent encounter, I’m not sure that I’m ready for such a proactive approach yet.
Have you had to tackle the subject with your kiddos?
Or have your kids had anything equally innocent and hilarious to say on the matter?