Several years ago James and I had the bright idea of cramming three Christmases into one day. We struggled to work out how to divide our time between his two sets of parents in Northamptonshire and my family back in Sheffield and devised a plan to please everyone.
The day began with brunch and bucks fizz at my mother-in-laws, followed by lunch with my father-in-law and a full on knees-up in Sheffield for the evening. Within about half an hour our military precision had slipped. With good cheer in full flow it was very hard to leave half way through the present giving to head to the next location. We were late for lunch, late to hit the M1 and late getting to the northern party. Understandably there were disappointed faces from the parents.
We ended the day full, exhausted and guilt-ridden. We hadn’t spent enough time with any of our families and both felt in trying to please everyone we had actually pleased no-one. James had to be the stone-cold sober chauffeur (though he was not driving the super cute Fiat above) and although we had been blessed with lots of love, gorgeous food and fabulous gifts we couldn’t help feel we had missed some of the magic of Christmas. The year after we hosted Christmas instead. Taking the previous years clock watching to a whole new level. Yes it’s not just the man from the Sainsbury’s ad who has a spreadsheet. I embrace excel too.
This year we’ll be spending Christmas in the north at my sister’s new house. It doesn’t currently have any form of free-standing kitchen but hopefully all we be resolved before the 25th December.
When I was little every Christmas Eve began with a trip to the butchers to the get the turkey with my grandparents, followed by hot chocolate and cake in a cafe. The night was always spent at family friends tucking into a tasty meal and then home to bed. On Christmas morning my sister and I always had piles of presents positioned in the same place each year. We’d don our new matching outfits and head back to our friends for mince pies and lashings of brandy butter before coming home to enjoy a Christmas feast with my grandparents.
It’s funny how back then I found huge comfort in traditions, but this year my whole family are in the same camp to make Christmas a bit different. After we lost our dear gran in the summer, we’re keen to forge new rituals as sometimes it’s just too painful to try to keep things as they once were.
James is luckily very accommodating for the unique situation this year as technically Christmas with his side of the family is long overdue. We’re planning on throwing a big breakfast bash for the in-laws the weekend before the big day, so we get two Christmas mornings. Hooray!
I have friends who really struggle with their parent’s expectations about where they’ll spend the big day, particularly those who don’t have children. In my friendship group it’s only when kids (and maybe a wedding ring) come along that it seems acceptable to break from the usual tradition. I know some couples have to spend it separately to avoid upsetting the rest of their family and some completely avoid their family homes to make it fair to their partner.
How will you be spending Christmas Day? How do you agree where you’ll spend the day? What are the traditions in your household? Has anyone else had to do a Reese and Vince and tried to cram in more than one dinner? They’ll be cats, kids, chaos and champagne this year and I can’t wait!
Due to lack of holiday days, we’re spending Christmas itself at home, just the two of us. We both have to work Christmas Eve and no car means relying on trains to get to family (none of which live near us).
However, we are going to my parents for a few days and spending New Years with them.
I have to admit that we haven’t actually spent a Christmas with my inlaws. My other half has a bit of a testing relationship with them and although I’ve suggested it in the past, he’s always said no. I guess it might change if we have children but we’ll see.
As for traditions – it always starts on Christmas Eve with Swedish food (lots of herring, potatoes, ham…) and presents, followed by Midnight Mass. And I might be alone on this one, but my family never open presents until after the Queens Speech…! I think this started as a way to drag Christmas out over the whole day when I was a kid, but my parents have still continued with this. Even if it’s just them and my Nan!
Have to admit that if it’s just the two of us, I still do the Swedish food on Xmas Eve and go to midnight mass, but come Christmas morning, we’re doing presents first thing lol. Although it does mean the rest of the day seems to drag by…!
I love that you wait until the Queen’s speech before you open your pressies. I reckon I could wait that long not sure about the kiddi-winks in the family though! x
Having only been married 10 months, this year is our first Christmas as a married couple and every year prior to this we have gone our separate ways on Christmas morning so that we don’t miss anyone out.
This year, to make sure time was spent with both families equally we thought we would host Christmas and have dinner for 12 in our tiny cottage. His parents have declined the offer because my father in law ‘likes to be at home’.
This means my new husband wil have to go to their house on christmas morning whilst I’m cooking.
I’m annoyed and disappointed that they couldn’t compromise considering that we’re newly wed and none of the other siblings are even with partners that need to be considered.
It also worries me for future years as now even though Christmas is at ours, it’s all my family who are coming, so next year I’m Sure hubby will think it should be about his family (even though they were all invited!) and what happens if we’ve a baby to consider then!?
Humph.
In future years hopefully they’d be beating down the door to spend time with their grandchild Becks x
You would hope so, wouldn’t you? My family even invited all the inlaws to theirs this Christmas to save us some hassle (and they actually have room for everyone at their house) but this wasn’t acceptable either.
Urgh, Christmas shouldn’t be stressful.
Ahhhh someone else who leaves present opening until after the Queen’s speech – I thought my family were the only bonkers ones who did that! Husband and I always spend christmas apart with our own parents – neither of us are quite ready to leave our own family traditions behind and the stress of deciding where to go doesn’t sound fun. I’m sure when kids come along this will change and we will make our own traditions (present opening after the queen will be mandatory) but for now we are happy going our separate ways. We always see in the new year together though so never apart for long.
This is quite refreshing Cat. No arguments, you just do your thing x
I admit I dread Christmas a little… My parents are divorced (and still won’t speak after 22 yrs!) growing up it became a competition of who would have us and when and then pressing us for details about other parent’s Christmas. That combined with copious hours being stuck on the m6, meant we never felt the spirit of Christmas. Luckily when I got married we were able to put our foot down and have Christmas at our own house, forging our own traditions. However, now we have a one month old and the questions about how we are spending her first Christmas have already started. Therefore, we have split three families over three days because I’m determined my daughter will love Christmas and the magic of it all! I’m painting a plate and cup for Santa that we can use every year for her when growing up, have ordered her new Christmas pjs, dress and so on! X
The painted cup and plate sounds adorable Rhiannon. What a lovely tradition to start x
Awww Christmas traditions, my favourite one is after opening our stockings (which are always in the same place for each sister!) we all have bacon butties and Buck’s Fizz. Last year, due to be ing heavily pregnant my hubby and I spent Christmas in France (where we live) away from all the british traditions, so this year we absolutely cannot wait to get back to the uk, family,friends and all with our son in tow!
We tend to alternate between each family each year which is a good compromise. I wonder if that will change now we have a child? This year we are at my family as we didn’t see them at all for the festive day last year AND my sister now also have a child, so we are all excited to see the new generation together at Christmas. CANNOT wait! The routine then continues as we have new year with my inlaws, we tend to share each celebration between families.
We did spend one year on our own when we bought our first home together, it wasn’t really what we expected. A little lonely and most definitely lacking in tradition, noise, chatter and what we felt Christmas should be. It did end in drunken memories however!
So I am already like a little kid as I think about going “home” for Christmas to be with my mum, dad, sisters, niece (!), hubby and …. For the first time, my son!
I’ve never fancied spending Christmas just the two of us. I’d be worried it would just end up being too much like a lazy Sunday. Although given the craziness in the run up this actually sounds quite nice!
Very much liking the sound of your plans this year Jill! x
This year we are spending Christmas day at home. The year before was spent at my parents and the year before that at my husbands parents. Early this year we realised that we were getting into a routine of switching between them so with a new house we decided to spend this Christmas by ourselves. I can’t wait! For us though Christmas is a time for family so once the actual day is past we are going to visit both sets of parents so we can see them and our siblings and their families. We have still yet to decide on the order and when exactly we are going to leave home to do this. Partly because my husbands brother isn’t sure when and whether he is coming back from Japan. This way means that we get three lots of Christmas (four if I count the extended family Christmas with my side of the family at the beginning of December).
As a kid I though my parents were barmy for making us space out our presents during the day but as I get older this is one of my favourite traditions. Not sure my siblings and I could have waited until after the Queen’s speech though.
Best of both world Sarah – a calm Christmas Day and lots of meeting and greeting on the other days. Cheers to your three/four Christmases! x
As soon as my laptop is closed for the year, I jump on the train and straight ‘home’ to my parents for Christmas…this usually means I get about 5-7 days there, which is such a relaxing treat. My parents are completely nutty about Christmas, especially my Dad. He still wakes my brother and I up on Christmas morning by shouting ‘Father Christmas has been!’ My bf and I haven’t spent a Christmas together yet as we both can’t imagine spending Christmas away from our families. We have a lovely December together in our own little home, cooking a roast with pigs in blankets and opening a bottle of champagne when we put the Christmas up together on the first weekend of December, so we don’t feel like we miss out on spending the day together. We also always spend New Years together, just the two of us. However…this year is slightly different! My parents have very conveniently moved 10 minutes away from my bf’s sister and her family. So he will be spending Christmas there and I’ll be at my parents. He’s joining us for Christmas Eve drinks and our traditional Christmas Eve pub meal (different pub, same idea). I am so excited at the prospect of spending the evening with my 5 favourite people. He’ll then go back to his sister’s afterwards ready for a 5am wake up call from 3 excitable boys, whilst I get a lie in until 8am (the cut off we give my Dad who would wake us up about 5am too if he could). After the big day, we’re planning on doing something with both families. I imagine the day will come sometime soon that we spend the actual day together, but for now I can’t imagine not waking up at ‘home’. Sorry…another essay of a post – my Christmas enthusiasm still hasn’t wavered after the post last week!
P.S Lauren, sending lots of love to you for your first Christmas without your Gran. Breaking with the normal tradition really helped us the year we lost my Gran. She usually spent Christmas with us, and my Mum wanted to do something completely different, so we went skiing that year. I hope forging new traditions this year helps you all and you have a lovely day together xx
Thanks so much for your lovely comment Sian.
I can definitely see why have s much enthusiasm about Christmas! Your mention about spending Christmas with your five favourite people made me smile big time. You’re going to have such a fab time. x
I guess I’m lucky in that a) my parents are pretty laid back, b) I’m pretty bolshy and c) hubs doesn’t especially want to spend time with his parents so we have a free rein to do what we want. It definitely also gets easier as you get older/less tolerant of family-related emotional blackmail 🙂
This year we’ll be at home for christmas, just the two of us, big walk to the pub on Boxing day with friends and kids/dogs then various family bits and pieces in between christmas and new year. I love spending time with my family but I do limit it as otherwise we end up feeling like slaves to them with never ending cooking and cleaning because we’re really the only ones who can host due to house size/location.
Oh, and I force myself to wait til after lunch for presents!!
I remember one year we opened all the pressies on Christmas morning and then got a phone call from my uncle in the North East. My cousins were opening one gift an hour so still had loads left to open. I was so jealous.
Now I try to wait as long as possible!
My husband and I have been together for 9 years this year and every year we’ve split Christmas Day in one way or another between our two sets of parents, for many reasons; tradition, practicality (we didn’t have the space to host), and a feeling of duty. No we have a three-month old and we’re in the new house with a DINING ROOM and a DINING TABLE, and space for people to sleep, we’re hosting a two-hander here this year! His parents and brother are here for Christmas Day and my parents, brother and Nan are here for Boxing Day. Now that we’re parents, it feels like the right time to break with old traditions and begin new ones. I have no doubt it might be slightly stressful trying to sleep and cater for all those people, but everyone’s going to muck in and if should be a good one!
Getting people to muck in is the key Tallulah. A lots of memories are made in kitchens prepping the Christmas dinner!
I’m so glad you did this post. I felt I couldn’t really comment on the last Christmas post as I’m a bit scroogey about it. I don’t call it Christmas I call it Christmas-gate. Every year we have to split ourselves several ways to try and please everyone. As a result for the last five years we haven’t really been able to enjoy it and as were half assing and clock watching were still not pleasing people. We have to see both sets of family and if we were to host Christmas it would be for 20 :S. Gah its just a pickle!x
Hope you still manage to have a good one this year Clare x
Book a holiday!
Trust me, they’ll get over it
Oh ClaireK you have not met the mother/mother in law. that would not be acceptable. What doesn’t help is both sides are happy to spend all day in one house so they find it difficult to understand and REALLY lay on the guilt. We go on holiday at new year as a compromise. Ideally I’d like to spend Christmas at one and boxing day at the other and the evening enjoying a drink at home and alternate but the mums would be so upset!
I’ve just realised, the above is a lie: one year, 2 Christmases ago, we spent 7 days inc. Christmas Eve, Day and Boxing Day on a skiing holiday in Austria with my best friend and her sister. I thought I’d really struggle not being home for Christmas but standing on the top of a snowy-peaked mountain under a bluebird sky singing ‘Rockin’ Around the Christmas tree’ at the top of my (still slightly drunk) lungs at 10am on Christmas Day was pretty bloody special. Traditions are great, but forging new ones or setting yourself up for new experiences can give you some of the most amazing memories!
This sounds brilliant! x
I love Christmas and this blog has got me so excited!
We have been together for almost 6 years and this will be our 3rd Christmas spending the day together. This year we fly back in from honeymoon on Christmas Eve so will spend time with my folks and stay at their house. On Christmas morning we’ll head to see my brother, sister in law and niece and do presents and then drive back to Edinburgh to our flat (for the first time as Mr & Mrs!!) and then spend the rest of the day with my new in laws!
It does involve a fair amount of travelling for us, but we want to see our niece and nephew on both sides of the family so just now we don’t mind it. The whole season is about family, in my opinion, so we just do what makes it work for the most people.
I hope your first Christmas without your Gran is ok Lauren, these things are tough because they involve a change in tradition and the way things have been done up until then. Raise a glass to absent friends and enjoy your day. x
What a glorious end to your honeymoon Marianne and thanks so much for your kind words x
Agh the great Christmas debacle. Its a crazy amount of organising isn’t it – all to try to please everyone, which ultimately can never be done as someone has to be sober, travelling, comparing sprouts to how their own mum makes them, missing family traditions, unable to see friends etc.
Well this year is going to be a bit different for us. We’ll either have a baby that is a matter of days/hours old, in which case I’ll be spending the day on my own sofa, in my PJ’s letting everyone else ‘do’ Christmas around my new little family, or indeed I could very well be spending it in the hospital giving birth! How Christmassy that would be (although I’m thinking more along the lines of birthing pool and gas and air than stables and mangers!) x
This is so exciting Georgina! Is your due date Christmas Eve? x
No – due date is the 16th – so I’m really hoping my Christmas bundle will be here in time for the big day. They say you go overdue with your first though so good chance of it happening on or around the 25th! Ooooo best Christmas prezzie EVER! x
Oh perfect! x
Even though I haven’t lived in the same country as my parents for 15 years, I’ve never spent a Christmas without them! I *nearly* managed it a couple of years ago but, last minute, copped out and bought a flight to spend it with them. It’s a bit pathetic at 33! I think part of the reason behind it is exactly because we’ve lived apart – Christmas has always been the one time that’s set in stone – it’s for family. You’ll spend the rest of your life prioritising your partner and children so it’s nice to give your parents that one special time for as long as you can.
Now that I’m engaged, we’re going to have to start contemplating splitting Christmasses apart (which is as hard for me as for my 31 year old fiance who has also never spent a Christmas without his parents!) – especially as my parents live abroad so there’s no chance of Xmas day with one set and Boxing day with another.
This Christmas is going to be amazing because my parents, brother + sis-in-law are all coming to stay with us in our new house. On Christmas day, we’re all going to my fiance’s parents house – along with fiance’s sister, husband, baby, husband’s parents as well as with fiance’s granddad! It’s going to be epic.
Christmas is always a really tough one but I think as long as everyone understands the different obligations then hopefully it’ll all work out. My xmas-obsessed Mum has (tearfully) managed two Christmasses without my brother (he was with his wife’s family as they alternate each Christmas) so it can be done, hah.
We’re both very fortunate Kate that our parents are so accommodating aren’t we. I know lots who aren’t so lucky and it just becomes one pile of hassle.
You’re in for such a treat this Christmas being with the whole family. It will be epic indeed! x
Completely agree, Lauren. Christmas *should* be a lovely, fun time and that means everyone getting involved to make it lovely. If it isn’t (or if people make it unpleasant) then boo on them – totes missing the point of Christmas. I hope everyone who is dreading Christmas this year for these sorts of reasons has a surprisingly magical one! x
In the words of Etta James, AT LAST… With a baby due between Christmas and New Year, after years of spending Christmas running ourselves ragged accommodating two families, assorted siblings and countless nephews and nieces spread across the UK we can finally tell everyone SORRY. We’re not budging. Happy sigh. If ever there were a good reason to procreate…..
hahaha! Philippa, I couldn’t agree more! Whilst my husband and I are not expecting a baby yet, I am very much aware that this will be the only thing relieve us both of what is otherwise a very stressful time of year! My parents are not big Christmas people, so don’t mind so much if I’m not at home, but this has meant 3 years in a row of spending Christmas with my hubby’s family. His parents are seperated, so we’ve had to negotiate the politics of splitting time between them on top of worrying about getting to spend some time together and me seeing my family at some point. This year, we’re spending Christmas alone. As it’s our first Christmas as a married couple, we’re going to just chill by ourselves. I am very aware though, that we probably won’t get an opportunity like this again until a baby comes along! Congratulations btw. Not long to go now!!
Ha ha Philippa, best reason ever! x
Well said. I’m due on the 16th and I am very happy that my little bundle will be the perfect excuse to create our own family traditions in the future that will pretty much involve my little one staying firmly out in his own house, with his new toys and everyone else can visit and come to us. We wont be budging!
x
We alternate between seeing my family for Christmas one year and then my husband’s family the next. This year we shall be hosting and are having my husband’s parents and his sister and her husband and two kids over. I have to say, I love Christmas again now that I have two kids of my own – they’re 5 and 2 now so are going to be so excited this year. So excited, in fact, that my eldest starting requesting things to go on her Christmas list in September. She’s even gone as far as telling me that she now prefers the adverts to the programmes as they give her more ideas for presents. Hmmm.
Anyway, I do find it weird getting used to other family’s traditions. Growing up, we always had smoked salmon and scrambled eggs for breakfast and then had to wait until everyone was dressed before we were allowed to open presents. My husband’s family all have bacon sarnies and have opened all of their presents by 8am! However, I’ve told them it’s my house so we’re going by my rules! This year I’m going to try something completely new and do american pancakes and fruit salad for breakfast (saw that idea in a magazine or book somewhere). Thought I’d try stRting the day healthily before we all succumb to stuffing our faces for the rest of the day! The kids are going to have a small stocking each when they wake up to keep them occupied and then we’ll all open the big presents from around 10. Probably with a side order of pigs in blankets and crisps and nuts to keep us going until lunch time! I can’t wait! X
Great idea to get the day off to a healthy start. Even if it does end with Quality Street 😉 x
As a child Christmas eve was always spent by driving from Cheshire to North Wales to spend Christmas at my grandparents’ house. With the 4 of us and my uncles families there was usually about 14 (6 kids) of us so it was a busy affair! Christmas eve evening we would go and watch the carol procession at Conway Castle and wait to see if father Christmas would make an appearance ahead of his busy evening! I really do have the best memories of those Christmases.
We carried on this tradition until we lost my lovely grandma and I had my first Christmas at my parents’ house. As my mum doesn’t love cooking we had Christmas dinner at the pub which was a novel experience. We had a few Christmas like that until I met my now husband and started to spend part of the day at his parents’ house.
Mike and I married last April so last Christmas was the first time we had spent the whole day together. It was so lovely waking up with him on Christmas morning and somehow really added to our first Christmas as husband and wife. I am incredibly lucky as my husband’s parents only live about 50 mins up the M6 from my parents, so we arrive in Crewe on Christmas eve (we live in London) laden down with gifts and have Christmas eve and Christmas morning (my mum does a special Christmas breakfast) with my parents and sister. Then we hop in the car and are at Mike’s parents for about 2pm and Christmas dinner (his mum loves doing it unlike mine!). We have boxing day (we always go sales shopping in Liverpool first thing on boxing day morning and then go to the pub in the afternoon) and most of the 27th with Mike’s family and then back to Crewe for another day or so with mine and then we are on the train back to London weighed down with gifts, sales purchases and the extra lbs from all the Christmas food.
I enjoy this new routine and we will probably maintain it until (hopefully!) we are have a little one of our own. Then I’m not sure I will be able to face the journey up north on the train, although I know both parents would be heartbroken to not have a little one there. But we only live in a small flat so there is no option of many people coming to stay with us. But we will cross that bridge when/if we come to it! And the pressure if off slightly as my husband’s brother moved to Australia so he always wins the Christmas guilt top trumps!
What a lovely way to spend Christmas Bryony. x
Oh I love Christmas traditions and long to be small again. Every Christmas eve my sister and I would watch Santa Claus the movie and then wake in the middle of the night to open our stockings (which was slightly ruined when my sister woke early to discover our step-dad was in fact Father Christmas!). Then in the morning it was presents followed by a trip to the village pub where everyone had gathered and back for lunch. As we got older we had to change things a bit to accommodate other visits, boyfriends etc and often had dinner on Xmas eve which was nice as freed up the day itself. One year I fitted in 3 dinners in 24 hours plus trips to 4 sets of grandparents and 4 sets of parents. I was exhausted! Luckily our families all live close so we tend to manage to see most people and for the last few years we have hosted which solves all the issues as people can come to us or thats it. We have the excuse of kiddies of not making trips out which suits me just fine and I love having everyone there. xxx
Your 24 hour story sounds crazy! You must have needed a lie-down after all that running around! x
Why is it so damn controversial?! We have ended up in a pattern of alternating – one year with Al’s family and one year with mine but with the added complication of my parents being split up. I’ve also got step brothers and a sister who aren’t permitted to be with my mum and step dad until 27th December at the earliest so it is a right old nightmare trying to see every one. I always look forward to Christmas as I get ages off of work (uni closes so don’t have to use much/if any annual leave) and always crave a nice, long relaxing break but it never turns out that way as it feels like we end up tearing around the countryside trying to see everyone. This year as it’s our first Christmas in our house we are hosting my mum, step dad and nan who are coming down to Southampton on Xmas eve and have invited Al’s mum and dad to join us in the evening, which will be Al’s birthday tea (yep, husband is a Christmas baby!). According to the law of Christmas alternation it should have been our year to go to my dad’s, and he’s OK with it and understands we want to have first Christmas at home but is already trying to get us to commit to going to him next year! Oh and although it would have seemed more logical to invite my dad to us, he lives with his girlfriend and her 3 children and they won’t travel anywhere or spend Xmas anywhere but their house. What a festive minefield it can be!
Indeed Kitty!
Your plans for this year sound ideal though and so nice you get to include everyone (and have a birthday celebration too!)
I equally love and dread Christmas. I love seeing and spending time with family, but dread sorting out who to see and when. With divorced parents on either side there are lots of negotiations and compromises- although as we get older the guilt and emotional blackmail is lessening I’m pleased to say. Last year was particularly awful as I got so drunk at our evening with Paul’s Dad’s side, I was too hungover to visit my own Dad the next day… #whoops.
Oh no Sama, I bet you were in the bad books then. I bet you’ll never let it happen again though 😉 x
Not if I want a Christmas present! 😉
For the last 10 years since my parents have been divorced I would end up driving to see my mum in the early afternoon then drive to my dad’s with my 3 siblings (before they could drive themselves) and have a Christmas meal in the evening with them. It meant my siblings having two Christmas meals, which they didn’t mind & I only saw my mum for a short time. When my other half came on the scene we would split over Christmas and then I would nip over to his parents at some stage. Although all live within about 1/2 hour of us it meant I couldn’t really ever get stuck into Christmas day.
Last year was our first married Christmas and I told everyone that I wasn’t leaving the house & if they wanted to see us on Christmas day they had to come to us. So my mum came over in the morning for champagne brunch with her partner and my sister, then my husband & I had the middle of the day to ourselves. In the afternoon my dad, brothers, sister and hubby’s parents came for an evening dinner. It was SO fun! I loved it. We played board games until the early hours and drank too much Baileys and Whisky! We saw hubbys brother & their family for christmas eve dinner.
I’d like to do the same again this year but I think hubby wants to do more with his brother so we will see! Perhaps we’ll have the whole lot?!
Good on you for standing your ground Victoria. Hope you have a great time this year whatever you decide to do.
A few years ago did a similar thing and it brilliant. I had a panic at the overlap of James’ Dad coming for breakfast and his Mum coming late morning but it all worked out fine in the end.
My husband and I have been together for nearly 9 years and this will be our 4th married Christmas. After spending one Christmas with our separate families (when it was too soon to say we wanted to spend it together) we resolved never to do it again; we missed each other far too much.
We are both only children and my in-laws are some of the most accommodating people in the world so we have often spent Christmas’ as one big family which has been occasionally stressful but usually lovely – particularly last year in a flat overlooking the sea in Cornwall. And we had one ‘married Christmas’ just the two of us in our tiny flat which is a very special memory.
This year though, is the first time we will be hosting Christmas! We recently bought a big Victorian house and I am joy-filled with the idea of starting new traditions which will grow will with our family.
I too though, am going to need a spreadsheet for the organising!
Aww Zoe, your Christmas last year sounds wonderful but I imagine it’ll be absolutely lovely this year, spreadsheets and all! x
*drivin’ home for christmas… oh I can’t wait to see those faces*…
We’re not so much driving home for Christmas, more taking a 24 hour plane journey to the other side of the globe with our 9 month old son in order to introduce him to his grandparents. Very VERY exciting times.
Indeed Naomi, you must be very excited!
I hope you were singing the Chris Rea version and not the Stacey Solomon one 😉
Ah Christmas is so tricky! I’ve been with my husband for 8 years (but only married for 6 months), and most of that time we’ve managed somehow to stay together on Christmas day. My favourite Christmas with him so far was when my in-laws hosted all of us in their lovely house. With room for everyone, it was festive and cosy, and we made the parents play Pictionary! No-one felt left out, and we visited other relatives on the days before and after Christmas.
We haven’t decided what we’re doing this year. It’s so hard to please everyone. I’m 5 months pregnant so next Christmas we’ll have a baby, and I’m sure then us all being together will be the biggest priority. It’s so easy to upset family at Christmas (people are TOUCHY!), but I think being together is the most important thing.
I haven’t played Pictionary in years Emily. I flipping love a festive game or two!
“Our” christmas is always a few days before Christmas Eve. We always have an esspecially nice day and exchange the presents in the evening. On the 23rd we both drive home to our families. I have a 4 hours train ride and he has a 2 hours train ride in the other direction. As our families live so far apart, we never had Christmas Eve together, although we’ve been together for over 13 years now and got married this year. He will join me at my parents on the 26th and we will stay there for a couple of days. Altough we spent every Christmas apart, it is always a nice thing beeing at home with my family and friends. However, I dream of a Christmas, when both of our families will be together… maybe we rent a cottage or a holiday home somewhere and everybody will come. This is a plan for the next year. Maybe we manage this.
Mia it’s really interesting to hear about folks spending it separately and it’s lovely to hear you say it’s nice to be with the family. Fingers crossed you’ll all get to spend it together in the future.
So nice to read everyone’s comments and see that I am not the only one to dread Christmas sometimes. I dread it but it’s also my favourite time of the year. Both our parents are divorced and even though my parents in law are super chilled, mine are not and we have had so many arguments in the past about where and when to spend Christmas. My sister and I are pretty traumatised! Last year we spent Christmas at hospital as our son was born on Christmas eve. Maybe his way of rekindling me with Christmas as exactly a year before I had the biggest argument with my dad over Christmas.
Soooo this year we are spending Christmas just the 3 of us! And then will drive to France to my side of the family on Boxing day for a few days. And I think that is what we will do from now on. I want my little boy to be in HIS house on Christmas day. I would have never imagined waking up in another country in a house that’s not mine on Christmas day.
Christmas should not be a stressful time, it is the best time of the year and I am determined to do things our way and stop the Christmas argument tradition!
Heres to making new traditions Marine. x
We’re really lucky in that both sets of parents have never forced their expectations on us. We have always done one family one year and the other the next, as we felt this was the fairest way to do it. We would then drive to the other house on Boxing Day to spend time with whichever parents we hadn’t seen Christmas Day. This has worked very well over the years, but has meant although we kept family happy we never got a break as we had to drive from Cambridge to Leeds and then the Lake District, fitting it all in over 3 days.
Finally this year we have said we’re not doing it. Our job situations have changed and we only have Christmas Day and Boxing Day off so we are staying at home. Just the two of us.
We are seeing my family the weekend before and his the weekend after, so effectively we will have three Christmases and hopefully still please everyone.
Hopefully it will be a lovely chilled out festive season for us. 🙂
Absolutely Alex, this way you’ll have all the fun and have a relaxing time too x
We spend Christmas on our own as a couple with our little dog. Rob works as a Retail Manager so we have very little time off together over Christmas. We spent one Xmas with his parents just the four of us but by mid-afternoon it fell a bit flat and we felt like we ‘had’ to stay instead of enjoying it. We tried having people round one year and nobody turned up when they were supposed (some over 2 hours late!) so we had to do the dinner later in the time we should have been enjoying ourselves. We tend to go to around four family dos in the week or two before Xmas do we have decided to keep it simple on the day. We have a Buck’s Fizz breakfast, go for a walk, open presents and eat too much chocolate and drink too much wine while watching Xmas films while cuddled up on the sofa
I am v excited as my Dad and Step Mum live abroad and for the first time in 10 years they are coming home for Christmas!!! It will be the first Christmas in about 5-6 years that myself, my sister and Dad and Step Mum will all be together on Christmas Day. Lucky my husband just joins in.
We’ve had Christmas just the two of us the last two years, the first one was good and the second I got a bit bored as I do like to play games hehe.
I feel a bit guilty as I haven’t spent it with my Mum and Step Dad for a while but we’re having them and my cousin and family over on Boxing Day.
Hubbies family are sprawled out and nobody wants to leave their homes due to pets (true story) so there will probably be a few jaunts before New Year.
Is it wrong I’m wishing November away…?